Monday 26 June 2006

Anxiety & impatience

I don't know if I can cope with all this waiting. My frustration is growing & it is so unfair, I'm gonna be kept waiting until the last minute as always....I wish Michael Schumacher would let everyone know wether he's carrying on or not!! I was sat watching the race in canada & wondering where all the excitement has gone from my beloved sport. Just wait until next year, Kimi & Michael at Ferrari...what a dream team! I like Alonso but absolutely no way can I support miserable mclaren ( has ron dennis had a personality bypass?, I think we should be told ).

Anyway I guess anyone reading this is wondering what this has to do with impending parenthood - nothing, I just wanted to get it off my chest.

So yesterday was quite calm, no nerves about the little one & its getting me worried now..how can i be so cool about this? I have suffered with depression in the past ( thankfully it seems like those days are gone ) but I do get stressed out quite easily & I can't believe I'm not a complete basket case. Still give me time I'm sure it'll happen. Next weekend maybe...not only is ther another race on but the finale of 24...how will my nerves cope. I think this journal is helping keep me sane, its a great release being able to tell a bunch of strangers ( although hopefully i'll get to know some of you over the next 9 months ) how I'm feeling knowing that i don't have to talk to you face to face!! Yesterday was actually quite weird cos I was thinking something ain't right, surely i should be more excited. Guess it comes in waves, can you imagine 9 months of total anxiety & excitement?

Today's been quite a good day though, my friend was not at work as early as usual & just as I was getting worried bout her she turned up with a grin like a cheshire cat ( if you're reading this, sooo happy for you both, or should that be all 3??!! ). So a happy friend, work was okay too and lost another 2lb...not a bad day! The other half nearly told her parents bout the baby but chickened out - still you can't have everything, guess she'll make sure i'm there when she tells them.

before I go I have to have a rant. I read in my paper yesterday that royal mail workers union is threatening a strike - how will we know the difference? The service levels from the post office has dropped substantially over the last coupla years & they want more money, how about we all walk out until we get a pay rise? I say they should start delivering ( no pun intended ) a reasonable level of service then maybe they will be justified asking for more money. My postie sometimes leaves cards if he's tried delivering a parcel, I try calling the office to arrange redelivery but can never get through, if I complain via the website it takes 2 weeks to get a reply by which time i've managed to get to the sorting office to collect cos I'm tired of waiting for them to reply. Either that or they deliver my parcels smashed to pieces, or postie leaves my parcels by the front door where they can be seen from the main road....very secure!!!

Anyway enough of the ranting...hope you are all having a good start to the week & thanks again to all those that have left comments for me, it is greatly appreciated...until next time.... 

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hi Vampjack
Congratulations and well done for the blog....I can't wait to hear how your girlfriends parents react!
Having children is the best!It's not easy but it tops anything.
As for 24...it's unbearable! What did you think of last nights epi?
love Phoenix
http://journals.aol.co.uk/phoenix71011/Phoenix